Experiment Six.

I sat slumped over the head of my chair, eyes dull as I aimlessly stared into the monitors before me, seamlessly showing me twelve different variations of the same thing. A man who I had recently kidnapped from the local hospital in the hopes of having a better supply of lab rats compared to the folks I was taking off the streets that smelled strongly of urine and liquor.

Instead I was graced with the equivalent of a tea cup Chihuahua, as I watched hopelessly as the man was now halfway through hour sixty three, still debating as to whether or not he should even open the goddamn door that led into the actual test chambers.

I take a small sip of my caramel macchiato before calculating the odds of gleaning any scientific advancement should I just pour a dozen or so mutant chinchillas through the ventilation ducts and let them have at him until all I have left to clean up was his kidneys. Seeing as to how that would make it the seventeenth time I would have done that in the past month I was finding the possibility incredibly slim, so I just stand up from my chair and stretch.

Seeing as to how the outcome of this test was most probably going to be with the test subject starving to death or dying of blood loss once he gnaws his own legs off, I decided it was high time I go and prepare myself a delicious midnight snack. I was thinking of an evil sandwich, with diabolical cheese, sinister salami, malicious mayonnaise and some tomato.

Now as I was making my way from my lab to the kitchen, debating on whether or not I should have Miracle Whip instead of mayonnaise (a conundrum I find myself at the center of every time I want a damned sandwich) I notice Elenoir from out the corner of my eye sprawled out upon the dreary couch in the living room whilst reading a rather hefty book.

Against my better judgment I change my path and tiptoe into the confines of the living room, my eyes peeking from behind goggled glasses and glancing at the contents of the book from over her slender shoulder. “What.” She says with an already annoyed tone and I take that as an engraved invitation to round the couch and stand myself before her.

“I was simply curious as to what it is you are reading there.” I point out simply and she just lifts the book up so I could see the cover without even averting her eyes from the pages within. “The plays of Oscar Wilde?” I query and she simply nods. “I didn’t know you were even capable of reading.” I continue and earned a raised eyebrow. “And what made you think that?” She breathes.

“Well when I last saw you I tried reading you The Divine Comedy but you only started crying because there weren’t any pictures.” I reply and she sighs. “Do we need to have this conversation again? I was six. All I cared about were crayons and play-doh. You tried reading me ancient transcripts and gave me a handgun to play with.”

I shrug my shoulders, “Well I thought that was what children enjoyed to play with.” Elenoir turns the page, “No, that was what YOU enjoyed to play with. Or used to anyway, my mom tells me you’ve been more into knives ever since I shot off your nipple.” My eye twitched at that reminder and I shift uneasily in my boots. “Yes, yes, you had quite the aim with firearms…” I reminisce and she just giggles. “Not really, I was aiming for your head.”

I let that sink in for a long moment before painting an overly exaggerated smile upon my face. “Well it was definitely a pleasure talking with you! Now I’m going to take this moment to continue on my way, you enjoy the rest of your book.” She waves me off with an uncaring hand and I’m left scrambling out of the room whilst still trying to look in control of the fear that threatened to make me run into my room and hide under the covers hugging my teddy bear (of science!) to my chest in the fetal position.

Forgetting my sandwich I’m quickly striding back into my lab with shaking limbs as I make my way back to the observation room of the test subject I was obviously observing. Hopefully the fuck will actually do something productive and I can shake myself of the last ten minutes in the name of science and advancement of my twisted and nefarious needs, otherwise its chinchilla time. That always cheers me up.