Experiment Eleven.

Now considering my talent for figuring out genius solutions towards bullshit situations, I should have easily tossed aside all fear and faced the problem head on, looking those carnivorous man made monstrosities in the eye and using my quick wit deal with the threat accordingly.

Instead I turned tail and ran screaming in the opposite direction, cowering behind the slender Elenoir in a vain attempt to elude the horrific creatures. Though considering that I was hiding myself behind another potential victim, nay, the appointed victim in this whole fiasco, I only played an even shorter stick than before.

Not to mention cuing Elenoir to sigh and look at me with an exasperated look pasted upon her little face. “Really?” she grumbled and began walking towards the kitchen, leaving me to face the creatures alone. “What are you doing?!?!” I cry out and she waves a nonchalant hand backs towards me, middle finger held high. “All this talk of cannibalism has made me hungry; I’m going to make a sandwich. You have fun now.”

I watched her leave in bewildered shock before glancing back at the encroaching beasties. One snapped her teeth threatening as another let out a feral howl. The hairs on the back of my neck rose within the throes of the blood curdling noise’s crescendo, and I felt the blood drain from my face. Before…

Well… I created the bastards! Ahem, bitches. Henceforth, I shouldn’t become just another notch in the  ‘man made monster kills creator’ statistics. So without further ado, I fell back from the advancing zombie cannibals, twisting on my heel until my peripheral vision was aimed opposite them and I thus proceeded forward at a quick speed to reach my lab.

Another bone twisting howl sounds behind me and I immediately heard the scramble of bodies hastening towards me, their muscles, which should have been succumbing to the first few signs of rigor mortis,  moved fluid and agile, allowing them to quickly catch up to me.

And even as they bit and grabbed at the tail of my lab coat, threatening my very well being,  I couldn’t help but feel proud of what I created, cherishing those brief iotas when they failed to lop a limb off with an almost… fatherly love. I created these amazing accomplishments of vascular science. If I didn’t have to kill them I would have loved to have been like my father and molest them.

Instead I had to show tough love and dive through the doorway leading deep into the realm of science! The howling monsters scattering close behind, I land in a heap at the bottom of the stairs that for the love of god I keep forgetting were there and I had to quickly heave my battered body to its feet and scramble towards my destination.

The incinerflamer! A device that broils whoever is inside in within a wave of flames that reach a higher temperature than that of the majestic sun!... also it has a side effect of causing sexual confusion in the minds of those who miraculously survive the flames. While I hold no grudge against those who find love within those of the same gender, learning about that side effect was incredibly unsettling. I will never look at mashed potatoes the same way again…

Anywho, I proceeded to once more send myself flying through the air as the cannibalistic humanoids lastly closed the incredibly close gap between us, a single ravenous maw taking a chunk out of my shoulder as I hurtle passed it and slam my passing fist upon the ‘ignite’ button. The doors immediately slam shut and the zombies inside are instantly enveloped in a maelstrom of flames that quickly licked away the flesh from their bones before melting the bones away in a sea of ashes.

But as I stood back to my feet and glanced in the window that had been bolted into place to allow accessible sight into the chamber as it was lit, I watched as in their final moments the group of zombified schoolgirls began tearing off each other’s clothes and committing such morbidly arousing acts of grotesquely violent sodomy.

“Genius! I have somehow created a legion of Lesbian Zombie Schoolgirls!” I scream in triumph, immediately whipping a notebook from out of my pocket and scribbling down a swath of unintelligible notes within its dreaded confines. “Isn’t that the name of a porno or something?” Elenoir queries behind me, my head twisting violently around to catch her standing there, gut wrenchingly cute with a sandwich held fast in her tiny grip.

My eyes were tightly trained upon the sandwich in her hand. “Is that… the last of the pastrami?” I whisper quietly and she answers by taking a large bite out of her lunch. “Naturally.” She replies between chews. My eyes widen and I thrust a pointed finger upon her adorable little frame. “I WILL DESTROY YOU!!!” I scream, Elenoir taking a moment to look over me, eyes lingering upon the gaping hole in my shoulder. “Yeah… Sure.” She replies and aptly turns to leave.

“You DARE treat me with Such INDIGNITIES??? Why I Should…” I quickly trailed off as the blood loss finally got the better of me and I crumple unconscious to the floor.